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A sort of “sex-friendly” yoga retreat, it taught me something called orgasmic meditation, which is centered on the woman.One Taste was the place where I selected most of my lovers, although I picked up a couple of guys, like the 23-year-old in Vegas, on business trips.But I’d made a pledge to my husband that I wouldn’t get involved with any of my lovers. But, by the end of the 12-month project, moving back home full time proved more difficult than I had thought.After you open up a marriage and experience a whole range of sexual variety and aspects of yourself you’ve never had before, it’s hard to put everything back in the box. I slept with a total of 12 people (including two women) during the Wild Oats Project. The person I was at 44 was so much different than the woman I’d been when I was last single at 26. Meanwhile, it turned out that, for around six months, Scott had been exclusively sleeping with one woman, a lot younger than me.“So your ad said only three dates,” he said, as we ate dinner in a crowded restaurant. Without missing a beat, he reached over and lightly took my fingertips in his.“Do you think we’ll be able to do that, to limit it? It was the perfect balance, living on my own during the week and then returning home.

Pulling on his pants after our intimate encounter in my Las Vegas hotel room, the cute 23-year-old I’d just picked up holds out his cellphone, urging me to tap in my number. Having sex with a stranger is thrilling, but I’m not that interested in a repeat performance.

I was approaching my sexual peak and was relaxing into myself.

I broke the news to Scott that I wanted an open marriage in early 2008, a few months after his vasectomy.

That bothered me, especially as they hadn’t been using condoms. After reconnecting with Alden and falling deeply in love with him, there was no going back.

But it wasn’t the catalyst for the end of the marriage, because he broke things off with her. He sent me an email, out of the blue, several months after the project had come to an end. Five years on, Alden and I are happily living together. I’m grateful I experienced my marriage to Scott (who has since found a new partner) but now, for this part of my life, I believe being with someone who is the most temperamentally like me is where I can learn more.

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